As an author of my parenting book, Parenting Scholar Athletes, www.amazon.com/dp/0578909499, my dream was coming true and it was becoming noticed. However, just as I was enjoying the accolades of my effort, I was also noticed by others who wanted to debate my book.

I’m lucky to have a supportive writing group who are of great support for me. When I reached out to other writers, I remember the words of sweet Ivy reminding me. She said, “When you start getting negative comments with the good, it means you’ve truly arrived. People are seeing you. They might not agree but they see you.” Just this helped me to my next level.

My Intention

My big annoyance is anyone trying to say that my book is misleading or not helpful. It has always been my intention to share my experience and knowledge with moms and parents. From the beginning, I’ve always to help them on their student-athlete journey of their child. Since I’m self-published, writers like myself know the sacrifice and cost it takes to step into this spotlight.

Because I was asked by another mom to share my information, I felt the potential in the idea. I spent 5 years writing, editing, revising and learning everything about writing and publishing. I felt a huge tug from the universe to complete this large task. Even though it was a hard venture, I enjoyed every step and level it took to make it to the top of publishing on Amazon and Barnes & Noble.

Instead of Reacting

So as I received a comment about being misleading to others, it really rustled my feathers. It was nice to see that I learned how to stop and reflect on my feelings that I learned from Matt Kahn (www.mattkahn.org) Instead of reacting, I sat with the feelings that were coming up and decided to see the remark in a different way. Instead of someone being negative, I looked at the comment being from someone with great wisdom. What I mean is I took the comment as one from someone trying to help me do better.

As I read through the comment, I began looking for the lesson that I could learn. When I saw the comment in this more positive light, it created a wonderful shift in me. Because I looked for knowledge to obtain, it all seemed to rush in. I spoke to my daughters of whom my book is written. What a wonderful moment when they voiced how the fact that I raised them to become independent and responsible helped them follow their dream of playing their sport in college. Not only that, but they connected my parenting to how it gave them the strength to accomplish all the other things they wanted to do like study abroad, graduate with high honors, and to nail the jobs they once dreamed of having.

Notice the Shift

I did notice how a whole new level opened up with questions to be answered, positive statements to be said, and new trails to follow. Since I replied to the comment with kindness, I was given kindness back. Although some only want to feel they are correct, it was nice to be heard. I used the questions provided as the next steppingstone in my book promotions. Realizing I didn’t have to let his poor comment change my intention, I knew my truth. Next, I acknowledged that others have the right to their feelings. As soon as that happened, I felt the shift.

Not only did this experience help me learn to take a negative comment, but it helped me. I learned to face my next fear of asking for what I wanted. After sales of my book, it was important to ask for a review. This made me step into that place of asking people known and new acquaintances to comment on their experience of my book.

Out of Calm Comes Manifesting

Talk about manifesting what you want! Right after meeting the negative occurrence head on, I received a spectacular review that matched the very reason and intention of why I wrote my book. I always wanted to reach not only moms with young athletes but new parents. I received just that from a wonderful dad telling me how I’ve helped him become present when spending time with his daughter. What a way to fill my heart by receiving such a beautiful review of how he loves to stay mindful in her presence. Those were the exact experiences I wanted new parents to have.

The next time you run into adversity, look for the lesson that you’re supposed to learn. That is really the job of the adversity; we’re supposed to learn something to help us move forward. We all wish and hope that it comes wrapped in a positive box, but that isn’t always the case. However, take it with a smile. Treat it as if it is your best friend offering a suggestion and let the negative become a huge positive in your life.