In All the Hustle & Bustle, Find Your Own Quiet Place

 

It’s that time of year again where you are pulled from every direction. Find the strength inside to take back your control and your peace.

As a mom, we have so many hats to fill. Because we are involved in matters at school, home, and work, we start to feel ourselves unravel at this time. The secret is to create a schedule of everything you want to do with the ease and acceptance of others. Start with a calendar of days for the next few weeks. Begin by making a list of all the things you want to do. The key here is want, not need. For example, you may want to have coffee with a friend, sit and gaze at your tree all lit up while thumbing through a magazine, or shop for those items you want for yourself. Put those wants on the calendar of days first.

Next create the list of have-to-do, but as you get to the end, go back and eliminate or put off some for after the holidays. If it is something you are torn about dropping, think about why you have to keep it. During this process, you will see what is important to you. Now, pass these needs on to others in the family. Delegate or simply find out if these needs of yours are really a need. It could be that you are the only one that feels these must be completed.

Now, fill in your calendar with these needs. Put your priority on the wants and stress the fun of the season over the hassles. Be sure to show up for the things you want. Show up to the coffee and couch. Remind yourself that you deserve this. Give yourself permission to do things for yourself even during the craziness.

Everyone has their own ideas of what a fun holiday entails. Recall the events that your family truly wants to take part in and let the other ideas go for another time. For instance, you may think that playing board games is a must, yet others may want to vegetate on the couch and watch a Christmas movie with you.

Find your quiet place in all these moments. Recall each moment while you bake, cook, or decorate. Stop and notice the quiet space. Breathe into that small portion of time. Notice the faces around you. Be on the lookout for joy.  The time you spend during the hustle and bustle is time you can never get back. Moving through it too fast only creates loss. Practice slowing down during every event and savor the peace.

It’s the joy that will be your memory. Collect them every day during the madness. These can be found while on line at the store, waiting for the green light, and slowly driving through the traffic. The moment you have in front of you is the only one you have. Make it count. Emphasize the fun over the hassles. Notice your children and their wonderment. When you do this, you create your quiet place full of joy everywhere you go.

Keep in mind, you have the power to do this, but it will take your actions to reach it. This is where it may get tricky. There’s that side of us that becomes concerned about what others may think of us. The judgment is all around. You have others asking for your involvement in the school functions. Others ask why you aren’t attending the cookie swap. “You’re not attending the neighborhood bash? You’re going to miss the Miller’s holiday gathering, are you?” Let others think what they will. This is probably the hardest part but venture forth.

Others will ridicule or say upsetting things only because they wish they had the courage to do the same as you. Radiate your happiness from your changes and stick up for yourself. Feel how simplifying your life creates the peace you hunger for during this busy time.

Bear in mind, this is your life. It isn’t won by those who are always in the spot light, controlling others, or by trying to be involved in every group. It is won by those who dare to be themselves and adjust their lives to their peace they seek within. The ones that judge are the ones that want what you have but don’t know how to get it. Instead of asking how to do the same, they condemn. Keep your strength, respond in a kind way, and enjoy your peace.