As we awaken, our soul begins its own spring cleaning. This comes in different forms and in different moments. Mine happened right in the middle of a huge fit of laughter regarding a joke that both my husband and I were having. Your childhood trauma can show up at any moment it becomes triggered and sometimes we don’t even realize why we feel a certain way. It is so important to allow whatever feelings come up and see if anything from the past comes up for you that can somehow be connected to what is happening now. If this is what is happening, then you are dealing with and healing a childhood trauma that you unknowingly have carried into your adult life.

Childhood Trauma

Childhood trauma can be anything that happened and caused you and your body to have to deal with a serious injury or shock, such as an accident, death of a family member, abuse, being bullied, surgeries, illnesses, or even getting a “C” on your report card. No two people are alike and what may be no big deal for one person, may well be a serious trauma for another person. What all traumas have in common is the emotional wound they can cause and the possibly devastating lasting consequences it can have to the psychological development of a person. Trauma will be triggered and come up again and again over a person’s lifetime until the occurrence that happens now can be connected to the past trauma that started the whole process, and then and only then can a person begin the process to heal that trauma.

The trigger, which came up as a surprise to me, started inside a moment of laughter. Since it was the weekend of daylight savings time, we discussed how I keep all the clocks in the house ahead about 5 minutes. Somehow, it keeps me on time because I always seem to be about 5 minutes late getting ready. As we were in the middle of a huge laugh, it was as if I was led out of the laugh while continuing to hear and see what was going on around me. However, my laughter stopped and it was as if I was watching a movie from the past in my head.

The Triggers

The laughter took me right back to a moment when I was just a young girl at about the age of 8 or 10 years old. I was in the large kitchen of my childhood home. With no smart phones, it was a time when others would drop by for a visit and we’d all sit around and talk. Someone had brought up how I was not laughing correctly at a comedy show that the family had attended. I was always 5-10 seconds late on the joke. Well, I remember getting reprimanded at the show and it was always a fun subject for my family to bring up when others came over. They could ridicule and belittle me again and again in front of others.

I remember how they laughed so hard at me. They were never the nicest or loving family, like I had always wanted. They consistently sought out and found the worst in someone else and when it became known, they made sure to bring it to the surface and verbally stomp it to the ground. It is amazing how our minds can hold on to something from such a long time ago, yet release it many years later because we’re in the right place. The fact that my husband and I were laughing really hard in a positive situation in the present brought me back to a really negative painful place in the past. This was my trauma showing up and asking me to heal that little girl who was hurt so much by her family so long ago.

Dealing With the Trigger

After that realization of what was happening, I tried to exit my living room and go upstairs to slowly let the pain and hurt come out in tears. I tried to make no waves with my husband. Now that I get to live the life of an empty nester, it is only my husband and I with nothing else to keep our minds preoccupied. I made sure to let the tears come however long they needed to. While the pain and remembrance from the past was coming up, I made sure not to push it away, hold on to any specific thought, or to relive the actual situation all over again. Holding on to this would only keep the vision in my mind, whereas my mind was cleaning house and getting rid of the old trauma about this situation that I still had inside me. I was now ready to release it so that hearty laughter can now be something that brings me joy and happiness and no longer sorrow and pain.

Because I welcomed the tears and let them come, looking back at this now, it really felt refreshing. Being ridiculed as a youngster is not acceptable, yet when you let these traumas come out of hiding, you are releasing it in a form of forgiving. You aren’t letting those who participated in the memory off the hook, you are forgiving yourself for feeling sad, humiliated, and knowing how to stick up for yourself. You are showing up now for yourself and releasing the memory and the pain of that memory so that you can move forward in your life. Like the saying goes, “The only person that’s going to take care of you is you.”

The Process Works

If you have experienced something like this, let it take its course. Let the fear pass and allow yourself to open up to release these traumas. By allowing them to bubble up, be seen and felt, and then show them the door, you are practicing the process to help release old trauma. The process includes the hurt surfacing and possibly resurfacing which is something we all want to avoid. However, once you let the older you see it, feel it, and be the knight to protect you now, it finds its way out. If you find you are having trouble or what is coming up for you is really overwhelming, there are specialized therapists who use a method called EMDR which can help you process trauma, so you can experience positive healthy emotions.

Tell a close and trusting friend. Once I did, I realized that everyone who is awakening is experiencing this kind of triggering. The more you share, the better you will feel. Sharing only brings it to light and keeps it out of the dark secret closet where they currently reside. They will continue to haunt you until you decide to meet them head on and process them. So, open your heart and mind, let your soul know you are ready to release any past trauma, and get ready to feel better than you ever have before.

**Michele Lusk-Echevarria is the co-author of this article. She is the close friend I mentioned in the article. As we talked about my experience, she was the one who talked me through this trauma. I knew we needed to share this with others. Just two best friends trying to help the world through the long distance calls we share!