Have you ever felt like God is throwing negative things and bad actions at you for fun? It makes us want to crawl further inside ourselves as well as put up our Gone Fishin’ sign.

As I maneuver through these rough times, I’ve learned to look at the lesson I’m supposed to learn out of all this.

Tough Times

In the tough times, I’ve also learned that not only do things happen for a reason, but these times are a way to actually toughen up.

Recently I listened to a reel made by @joedrummer on IG. The story was about different things that were happening to a man, where he would only say “maybe” after those around him would say how lucky he was for those series of events. What I received from the story was that we need to sit a look back for a second. It is important to realize that the events in our lives that were negative actually had a positive effect down the road.

Are We Lucky? Maybe

When we lose people in our lives through death or change in ideas, it can make us panic at first. However, once I start to connect the dots, I can see how a wonderful event wouldn’t have happened unless the negative one occurred. Maybe you’re in a harsh relationship. But you would have never experienced a beautiful travel experience because you needed it to actually happen in order to travel.

Not long ago, I found out that a sweet neighbor passed. He was someone I had a chance to shoot the breeze on my walks. I found out where he grew up, where he attended college, and his dreams of moving to a quiet place after selling his nest egg. It turns out the nest egg paid for his hospital and care for his Alzheimer’s. Lately, I walked that same stretch of road in front of his old home and realized the new owners cut down the tree that was in front of his home. That was the tree that I picked up its leaves that fell with the best autumn colors and take home to iron between two sheets of wax paper.

Feeling the Cruelty

At first, I was devasted and heard myself blurt out, how can God be so cruel? That’s all I had left of the memory of my dear neighbor.  Now that I sat with it, I can see that God is actually making me step out of my comfort zone and find a new tree that might actually come with a new sweet neighbor.

Meanwhile, my head is fighting over the knowledge that I receive harsh behavior. However, I do not have the means to move away from it. A new question of why does God let these actions happen to us even when we are working so hard to make things nice? Once again, why is God so cruel sometimes? If he is in charge of the whole universe, why are those of us who would do anything for others experiencing such poor behavior? Not only that, but then we are the one blamed for their horrible actions.

Understanding

In these situations, some might see that they wouldn’t have such wonderful children or the experience of raising them. Others may see that if it wasn’t for these mean people, we wouldn’t be so knowledgeable. We’re aware of who we really are and more importantly how strong we truly are. Some may find that nature and simple things around us are our true love. We also see our passion to teach, share, and help. During many sad and negative moments in our lives, we have taken the deep dive. We have done the work and know that this path is how we come out of our grief, sadness, and confusion. God shares his nature, gifts of writing, acting, and teaching so we can see that those are the ways out of our sorrow.

Mercy and Forgiveness

As a matter of fact, when I look at the mistreatment from others, I guess it’s God’s way of helping us become an even better person by acknowledging their faults, just like we have, and give mercy. During discussions with a friend who has a closeness with God reminded me that mercy is what we all want. Sometimes others just don’t know how to give it. In that time, we need to step up and give it even when we don’t believe they deserve it because we believe their actions were so unacceptable. By offering our mercy, we are allowing them to take time and look at their own actions. This may help them turn the corner and learn from their mistakes. If they don’t change, that’s when our free will steps in and helps us realize we can help others away from them.

Malice to Courage

While you maneuver through your angst, remember to give mercy and love to yourself. Because you are offering others so much love and mercy, you deserve to receive it as well. Giving yourself kindness and calmness is essential to your own break throughs. We need to realize that we deserve every kind gesture we give to others tenfold. Because we know the faults we created, we know the strength it takes to face them. By sharing this with others in need, we can see that it’s God’s way of teaching us. In turn, we realize he’s not cruel, he’s just helping us become the best person. Stay brave.